Sunday, December 21, 2014

The PO Box and why people go postal. Blah-Humbug!

JUST REMEMBER-EVERY RIVER STARTED OUT A  STREAM...BY ME!

Well now. I'm not proud to say today I'm almost over the most degrading postal experience I'll not soon forget..I decided to mail a woman in Canada all my Canadian money I keep finding in old NY boxes. I lived many years in a border town in upstate NY. I really miss that small town called Duanesburgh population 922, and Plattsburgh on Lake Champlain. Best fishing ever---but I digress...

I recently found a bunch of Lyme peeps helping each other out, so I decided to do what I could by sending said money. You would think I had a bomb strapped and visible to everyone with what transpired next.

MK...I am at the window already addressed my little package containing 1 $5 Canadian Dollar Bill. 1$2 Canadian Dollar Bill. 2 $1 Canadian Dollar bills. 5 $2 Canadian coins, 4 Quarters, 2 dimes and 3-4 nickles. Had it all written down and everything. I admit I can look pretty strange when I go out, but I had just showered. Yea-I smelled clean. Yea-I slur a bit and am bald, but I was wearing a beautiful scarf my dad had just sent over my bandanna covering my head. Woman at window is trying so hard not to stare and mumbled something about Customs and printing it out. I must have said 'what?' Too loud or something because she looked so startled as she fled telling me to go "down the hill" where they could help me. ?

"Down the hill" is another post office. Only 12 miles away in dense fog, after a big snow, with 2 bald tires and 1 flat, off we went.

Man-what a line! I wait and ask for Customs slip and window lady says "you should mail this UP the hill. You have to fill it all out and wait in line again" No preblemo! I tell her they just sent me DOWN the hill, and she remembers the substation has different rules for Customs. I handed her my already made slip of what was inside, but she had found the Customs slip after banging drawers open and shut....

I go to fill out said slip. "Crapola" I think to myself..."NO pen!". Still filled with determination, I wait another 10-12 minutes in line to ask for a pen. Eyes rolling and huge sigh, I get a pen, a stern warning to "make sure you fill it ALL out!" and hear the snickering from the people in line and see a woman whispering (loudly) into her hand to the man behind her, "my God. Do meth much?" This is always the first thing people think is wrong with me here in California. Can't be my teeth, I have them all. Can't be the clothing, my boots alone were $300, and I don't go out any more looking shabby. (I seldom go out at all) Must be the weight loss...

Next thing I know I'm getting that horrible anxious feeling Lyme gives us when embarrassed, flummoxed or lost, so my eyes won't focus. Things start getting wavy lines, holes in words-being upset with Lyme ain't purity. I end up going outside and asking my landlord to help by reading the boxes and I'll fill it out. Nope. He has some issues and wants to fill it out he himself...-----*sigh*-----

Soooooooo. What would have taken 5-6 minutes, 40 minutes later, he hands me my name and address filled out and says "I don't know what these boxes mean, so you'll need to GET BACK IN LINE and ask when you get to the window again, for help." EGAD! In 9 minutes, the place closes. A bit shaky, I go back and wait in line.

This time the doors were locked behind me just as 9 running persons just squeaked in.

Unfortunately I started rocking back and forth. It is something I cannot help nor stop because I feel like I"m on a boat. Sometimes I'll drop to the floor slurring, drooling and vomit or dry heave all the while I can hear distant sounding voices, but am unable to respond as my tongue and lips swell. Dreading that outcome makes me rock more and adds this sound. Uncontrollable "bee-beee" repetitive noises always attract unwanted attention...But!!!! I'm almost there to the front of the line, and I want so very much for this lady in Canada to be able to have a turkey with the $21 & change I'm sending her. I hold on chanting "bee-bee-beee" from my mouth and the Serenity Prayer in my head, and I make it!
 Almost.
 I tell window lady, "I apologise. I left the house without a pen or glasses because I had no idea about Custom"s slips". She didn't respond. Not right away anyway. She sure was pissed when she noticed what my landlord didn't understand and I couldn't see but for a few wavy lines. She bellows "I TOLD YOU TO FILL IT ALL OUT! YOU LEFT THE MOST IMPORTANT PART BLANK!" The last 9 people in line even looked shocked as my eyes started tearing up, making me even more blind I again explained how I can't see without glasses, I have Lyme Disease and she took my slip to a closed window, slapped it down and said "can you see what you wrote here? Write it again here!", referring to original scrap paper with all the denominations, coins, etc on it.
 I'm shaking pretty bad by now, "bee-bee-beee" louder and everyone is staring as I think I copied it right. Back to the end of the line, someone says "just let her go ahead" so again I am facing the mad window lady and she announces "that will be $8.90". The inner moan of the crowd was almost audible as I squeak out "I only brought $7"...."Then it looks like you're out of luck doesn't it!"

I stumbled out the door tripping over the carpet and everyone laughed. I hated myself at that moment. I cried all the way home seeing the laughing faces, hearing the snickering. Why does Lyme make everything so difficult and make a person so strange looking, takes your hair, your mind, your dreams.?? It leaves YOU locked up inside, feeling so lonely knowing how odd you look on the outside. Whenever something like that happens, I feel a loss of yet another piece of what used to be me slowly slide away, replaced by feeling like nothing but crap. Why does Lyme seem to make people angry, or is that just me?

I want people to know about Lyme. I guess maybe 9 more know about it now in any case. All I can do is try again tomorrow to mail Canadian money to someone in need. I know a person that would and has done the same for me.:-) :-) :-) :-* :-* 😊

Happy Holidays. May you all get money in the mail!

Sunday, November 2, 2014

HEALING WATER THINKING CAN MAKE A BIG SPLASH TOWARDS RECOVERY

BE WATER. WATER CAN CUT THROUGH EARTH AND STONE. WHEN TRAPPED, WATER WILL ALWAYS FIND A NEW WAY, A NEW ROUTE AND A NEW POSSIBILITY TO ENSURE IT'S  CONTINUING EXISTANCE.  
BY LYNN LAMOUREUX

Consider this; the human body is nearly 90% water. The teachings of Dr. Omoto allow us to see and open our minds to unconsidered possibilities.
Next consider this; the human brain does not know the difference between what it is seeing/happening now and what it has seen/happened in the past.  
Also consider; our lives, moods, pasts can mold every future act or decision it makes based on an emotion attached to our memories.
Does this mean we are stuck in our past mistakes and make them over and over?? I believe it's quite the opposite-so let's examine some possibilities.
Applying the Quantum Field sounds daunting-but it's not. Anyone who looses themselves while doing something they are completely committed to, and I mean time and space no longer matter, you just ARE; you are unconsciously making the choice to enter the Quantum realm.
When a body does exist in an unlimited possibility state, changes down to the cellular level take place, first and foremost, the addiction process takes a hit because inside the cell receptors are filling with NEW peptides, releasing NEW, DIFFERENT states of being and the brain no longer plays the same old script a body is used to (addicted to):My definition of addiction=ANYTHING a person cannot stop, even an emotion, state of being, often accompanied with the definition of insanity-doing the same action and expecting different results.
I started with water it being the most receptive of the four elements. Knowing how pig headed I can be so I require lots of proof, (an emotion I'm sure I'm addicted to), I watched the Study Of Water over and over until my resistance to change wore down and I gave it a try. I picked up my water containing my grapefruit seed extract, liver cleanse herbs, and held it a few seconds telling it "this water will heal me with love". I then told myself "this  water will heal me with love". All day, every day I held my water filled with love and healing, repeating my loving healing message with every sip. It's WORKING. For so long I was filed with self loathing, pain, guilt, all emotions I have been addicted to. To heal from disease I'm finding requires what they say in AA "an attitude of gradatude" and not only apply it-BELIEVE it-live it  Change has to have room to grow. Negitive emotions will wear a cell down so when it splits into sister/daughter cells, its 'sick', tired and certainly open to any virus/bactera/parasite invasion. Cells filled with 'good vibe receptors ' will split stronger and be  more resistant
I am now experiencing so many inexplicable things-amazing things, beautiful human connection things!
I also started having different memories of happy times, started dreaming, amazing for me to dream as I have had few the last few years due to Lyme. I realized looking back, I had often lived in the Quantum realm, believing with all my heart and soul I could do and be anything I wanted. The hard part for me was to keep living in that realm; example; When I was 36 I decided I really needed to get a less physical job and that required computer skills. Never had I used or had a computer, with the exception of working as an in house dispatcher in a hospital-a job I really loved, but the computer was simply a glorified switchboard, not taking any Word/Excel experience.  I went to the Unemployment office and signed up for every class involving computer skills I could find. One day my career counselor called me into her office and just outright asked me "what does your heart and soul tell you as far as a career choice". I answered honestly-I was a musician. I was an artist. I was a gardener. I was always creating things of beauty out of what others considered junk.  I told her I wanted to open a craft store where I used what the land offered, which in upstate NY is grapevines everyone wants to get rid of, and use flowers I grew and dried myself to make wreaths. She asked me to come back in a week with a wreath and any other ideas I had. Long story short-I ended up with a $20,000 grant, started up my business and BLEW IT! I had lived in the  Quantum realm the entire 2 years it took me to write my own business plan, present it to COC, even played my flute for our Senator who presented me with my grant-then my now ex screamed at me-"I never got something for nothing"-enter self loathing. Enter guilt. Enter self doubt. All the new cell receptors I had built got reprogrammed in a matter of days-surely this stupid woman who only made it to 10th grade deserved nothing good.only bad, punishable by simply existing was what I deserved. THIS IS/WAS SIMPLY THE MOVIE REWIND I WAS ALWAYS ADDICTED TO-it's so much easier to fail and meet every ones expectations of failure then to keep believing in yourself and stop owning every ones pain as your fault. It sure gave me enough ammo to repeat these types of behaviours and even find people to feed my addiction to misery.
In conclusion, what I'm trying to explain here that applies to chronic illness, is 'thinking good thoughts' is a band-aid if one is not careful to daily implement new experiences and emotions because every day, every hour, every minute is a possibility to feel better by letting go of the old movies-give yourself a break-find a passion and do it. My new passion is research and sharing ideas. I believe with every cell in my body I will get better and I deserve to get better.

















Friday, October 10, 2014

A word about Biofilms and QUORUM SENSING

"UNLESS WE PUT MEDICAL FREEDOM INTO THE CONSTITUTION. THE TIME WILL COME WHEN MEDICINE WILL ORGANIZE INTO A UNDERCOVER DICTATORSHIP TO RESTRICT THE ART OF HEALING TO ONE CLASS OF MEN AND DENY EQUAL PRIVILEGES TO OTHERS. THE CONSTITUTION OF THE REPUBLIC SHOULD MAKE A SPECIAL PRIVILEGE TO MEDICAL FREEDOMS AS WELL AS RELIGIOUS FREEDOMS"
BENJAMIN RUSH MD
1735-1813

Can I get an AMEN?
American Society For Microbiology states "The discovery of intracellular communication among bacteria has led to the realization that bacteria are capable of coordinated activity that was once believed to be restricted to multi cellular organisms. The capability to behave as a group has obvious advantages. for example. the ability to migrate to a more suitable environment/better nutrient supply and adopt new modes of growth . such as sporulation* or biofilm formation. which can afford protection from deleterious environments. the language used for this intracellular communication is based on small self generated signal molecules called inducers"
(*sporulation 1-a type of reproduction that occurs in fungi. algae and protozoa involving the formation of spores by spontaneous division of a cell into 4 or more daughter cells. each of which contains a part of the original; nucleolus. 
                    2-the formation of a refractle body, or resting spore within certain bacteria that makes the cell resistant to unfavorable environmental conditions. The cell regains it,s viability when conditions become more favorable.)
So now I must apply this to Lyme and ALL diseases that refuse to be "cured" by regular means of treatment-in theory of possibility. that is....
If cells can communicate and form biofilms, why is it not common knowledge in medicine today? I have read and studied over 100 documents, best in my opinion. put out by the Atlanta Center For Disease Control. describing and clearly indicating biofilm production is a real obstacle in treating disease. There are actually good biofilms-Dr. Oz is always telling women to lather on the creams for virtually everything when skin is moist "to keep the moisture in" . thus creating a good biofilm to protect your skin from free radicals like pollution or sun overexposure.  Woe be to you however if you are lathering protection on skin containing bacteria. fungus or protozoa. or any combination. 
I theorize-that ringing in your ears? Quorum Sensing.. Seizures? Quorum Sensing.-either you are uploading your Bb shed previously to wait for a more suitable environment ,or downloading (HERXING)  Bb into your environment to also wait for a more opportune moment to regather, thus producing relapses. Skin crawling sensations? Quorum sensing seeking out and gathering pathogens to add back into the biofilm environment.  Stinging, stabbing, water being poured inside you, electrical shock feelings. in my humble opinion can all be explained by quorum sensing as well as relapse if these organisms can basically lay in wait until there are enough of them to create a new infection. I use Bb as an example because of it's voracious appetite. I believe TB is also a fine older example of quorum sensing and it's ability to morph from bacteria to a skin fungus.  Granuloumus diseases which produce granulomas that erupt in constant shedding of  'grains' I always thought to be infectious or some kind of mite refusing to leave are present in carpets, bedding, pillows, clothing-everywhere. 
I have, fortunately, come across some cheap methods of ridding myself of the white specks that surround me like "Pigpen" of the Peanuts generation. I found if I put a glove on, vinyl., it  made my ears stop ringing! This action leads me to believe I have stopped communication, however null, between the biofilm colonies and prohibiting rapid formation that occurs touching an infected environment, Biofilm has the capability to exist ANYWHERE and on ANY surface. (Just don`t leave them on too long however, you end up with more layers of fungi-but if I rush to a sharp object, I can scrape it off and dry with alcohol-70% or above)  I now always use 2 gloves to make dinner. I got tired of eating the specks. Also I wear socks ONCE only-6 pair for $5 at Wallmart is a Godsend. I wear socks to bed and it keeps specks (some anyway) out of my bedding. I keep my fan on constantly directing specks outside and rake the ground every few days. I wear flip-flops that I also throw away after a few wears-keep shoes for outings separate and wear them only outside the home so not to pick up or track more spores, bacteria or whatever. I use separate washcloths for my head, (still don't know what is infecting that so far, but it.s black, stinky and nasty), my feet, my trunk, another words-use a different washcloth for each part your body. It`s possible to have several different infections for different parts of a body. I toss all washcloths  if they feel slimy or smell funny. Always dry off with a fresh towel and if it seems to be growing fuzz-toss it. Same with bedding. I tore my carpets out and it helped immensely-for a while. I'm far from feeling great, but feeling better is awesome. 
I worked on a video showing how biofilm is formed and is sometimes elusive and becomes an issue in living or dying when it's basically invisible. If there is something affecting your brain, (like neuro Lyme)),it  can make a doctor immediately send you packing to your shrink.  I know I'm OCD now and get very excited and spazz out over little things that never bothered me before. I'm admitting I need some shrinkage-is that a word? What really gets me going however is a Dr. explaining everything with "it's your imagination" or even "you are a paranoid schizophrenic"-without a glance at your eyes, throat, skin-NADA. Which is why I made this video. A camera sees what the naked eye does not. A camera is not judgmental and I believe it would be an amazing tool for doctors. I also wonder whatever happened to the black light or "Wilson's Lamp" test-so simple to bring in a black light and it lights up fungus, bacteria, blood-it's free and a doctor can in seconds see if a test is needed-faster than you and say "delusional"....
Come to think of it-do delusional people not get diseases? Why is crazy a catch all for  anything a Dr. doesn't feel like testing or whatever motivation to not act like a Dr. ? I shudder to think of how many are drugged to keep them not feeling anything. But that's a post for another day.
This post was going out 3 days ago, but my laptop crashed and I simply had to set things aside rather than risk getting upset and causing seizures, I`m back on my tablet with a very limited view in one corner-so please bear with me  bit while my brain goes back to the android system. I also have several biopsies scheduled over the next few weeks.  So with no further ado--. Warning-it is graphic, so may disturb children.......
http://vimeo.com/08571623 (I•m really, really hopeing that link works, but I also put it in links along with a youtube video of biofilm forming from Bb by itself.)     
Next post will be about applying Quantum Physics to disease featuring the `Study of Water`